There is a better way. Three steps towards trauma resolution

Anders norrback bornholm 📷

Whatever your Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) you will probably feel alone because your experience is unique and as a child you did not have the resources to deal with what life had presented to you.  And because of that you developed a range of protective layers to keep you safe.  Maybe you held in your emotions because no one was there to process them with you, maybe you learnt to be ‘good’ so as not to upset the adults around you.  You may have had to forgo typical childhood things like play and creativeness because you needed to undertake the role of the grown up or caretaker.  Whichever it is those protective layers stuck with you and followed you into adulthood long after the trauma had passed. 

You don’t have to live in reaction to your past trauma and you don’t have to keep up those protective layers. THERE IS A BETTER WAY.

I underwent years of therapy and don’t get me wrong they were good therapists and I felt supported; however I wasn’t moving forward enough or fast enough.  What was wrong with me why couldn’t I be successful in my career despite my hard work.  Why wasn’t I in a relationship? when everyone else appeared to be.  Why was I fearful of life?  I then found an amazing coach who understood trauma and abuse and who helped me find my true self which was just underneath those protective layers.  And by working with the body and emotions not just my anxious mind we joined my whole self ‘up’.  Now I lead a fulfilled life with a new life story.

So now you have heard that there is a better way; what then is the secret to a new and fulfilled life. There are many small steps to trauma resolution here are three of the biggies.

01. You are not broken, and you don’t need fixing.

This is hard to believe when you have experienced trauma and often you end up blaming yourself for what happened.  Understanding that you were young and didn’t have the resources to deal with the situation in hand helps you know that you were not in any way to blame, nor could you have done or said anything to change the situation.

 

02. You need to work with both the mind and the body. 

We often disconnect our feelings and emotions and try to ‘work it out’ in our heads.  This often leads to an overanxious mind as thoughts go round and round searching for a secure landing place.  Reconnecting to your body is key to your healing.

03. There is a new story to tell and live. 

The story of your experience can become stuck as often it’s the only story you have known.  Your story is a very valid and important part of you it shouldn’t be ignored or torn down however, space needs to be created for a new story one that you can live your new and fulfilled life.

Tanya Street Psychologist and trauma resolution coach